THE POEM:
1) Palem Apokpi, mother who gave birth to me,
to be a man how I hated leaving home
ten years ago. Now these hills
have grown on me.
But I’m still your painfully shy son
with a ravenous appetite,
the boy who lost many teeth after
emptying your larder. And
I am also your dreamy-eyed lad
who gave you difficult times
during his schooldays, romancing
every girl he wanted, even
when he still wore half-pants.
2) You told your children that
money and time do not grow on trees, and
I could never learn to keep up with them.
It isn’t that I’ve forgotten
what you’ve come to mean to me
though I abandoned much and left
so little of myself for others
to remember me.
3) I know how you work your fingers to the bone
as all mothers do, for unmarried sons,
ageing husband and liberated daughters-in-law.
Worried about us, for a long time
your lips couldn’t burgeon in a smile,
lines have furrowed your face and
first signs of snow are on your hair.
4) Today, as on every day you must have risen
with temple bells before cockcrow, swept
the floors and after the sacred bath
cooked for the remainder of us. I can see you
returning every dusk from the bazaar,
your head laden with baskets.
Must you end toiling forever?
I’m sorry Palem.
I’ve inherited nothing
of your stable ways or culinary skills.
Forgive me, for all your dreams
of peace during your remnant days
I turned out to be a small man
with small dreams, living a small life.
EXAM NOTES:
1) ABOUT THE POET:
Robin S.nagngom was born in 1959 in Imphal of Manipur in North Eastern India , is a translator &poet by profession and also teaches in both Eastern hill university. He studied literature at at. Edmunds college l, he was awarded by Katha award for his translations in 1959.KNOW MORE HERE
2) THEME:
The major theme of the poem was of the MOTHERHOOD & AND SACRIFICES A MOTHER DO.
3) A BRIEF SUMMARY :
•The poet starts the poem by going down the memory lane when he was a child & compares it toh the present, he shares the glimpses of the dreamy days of his childhood and how he used to feel loved at his mother's house in the hills, he shares how he grew up romancing every girl in the town & creating mence for his mother but now he has become an adult ,became independent and the cost of this independence was staying away from his mother.
• In the Next stanza he speaks for every mother about how they sacrifice almost everything they have to their children & how they keep on toiling day and night for their children and their husbands well being , do every household chores and still their efforts are not being recognised.
• But he ends the poem with a regret and guilt of not fulfilling the minimalistic expectations she had from him which was of love from her children in return which is the liability of the poet and hence creates guilt within him.KNOW MORE HERE
4) CRITICAL ANALYSIS OF THE POEM:
•The poem starts with a nostalgic feeling deeply engraved in the poet which is signified when he says 'palem apokpi' refers to his mother who gave birth to him, this shows how he starts with the feeling of gratitude in him for the good deeds she did for him.
• He then says how he hated leaving the house when had to leave the house where he used to live with his mother , where he was loved, being pampered, where he romanced every girl in the town while growing up , he hated leaving that house in hills where he was caressed by his mother's but he had to just in order to fulfill his big dreams ,ambitions , aspirations , to earn money and to be independent.
• Additionally In the first stanza itself the transformation from a boy with ravenousa appetite to a boy who lost his milk teeth , from a boy who romanced girls even when he was in pants to a grown up adult that he is today , these phases of childhood teenage and then becoming an adult are shown specifically in the first stanza itself.
• In the next stanza he share the wisdom that his mother gave toh him as a child which was ' money and time' doesn't grows on trees which clearly indicates how her mother tried to inculcate the importance of money and time , and if you compare it to the contemporary times in which poet is people either have money or they have time to spend with their family , which is also a case with the poet which shows a failure to abide by the wisdom that she inculcated in him failing to which a sense of disappointment is seen in the next line line of the poem , next he adds that he hasn't forgot anything but has just abandoned everything , this indicates to the relationship that he shares with his mother that he hasn't forgotten anything yet but but had to abandon that relationship just in order to fulfill his ambitions.
• In the 3&4 stanza the poet talks about all the mother's universally how they keep on toiling for their children, ageing husbands and 'liberated daughters in laws' but the catch here is that with liberated he becomes sarcastic he points out to the fact that how these liberated daughter in law's are not emphtetic towards their mother in law's towards the work they do for us everyday, and how they see doing household chores with disgust which is pretty evident even in the contemporary times, next he adds how the mother's are always worried about their childrenthat they hardly smile with joy, they become
happy with their child's happiness.
• At last he ends the poem with a deep sense of regret that he spoiled her dreams of peace in the old age , the affection that every parent expects at the old age , he is even unable to give her that because of his busy work schedule , and in the ends says that I turned out to be a small man with small dreams living a small life clearly states his state of mind that he is again disappointed with himself as well that the reason he left the house to fulfill hi big dreams and ambitions went in vain as he is unable to fulfill even his own expectations with himself.
MY HONEST OPINION:
•At last the question that comes to my mind after reading this poem was that had ever expressed this sense of gratitude for his mother ever he wouldn't have been in a turmoil right now but that's just my honest opinion tell me yours in the comments
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